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Faith of a Shadow Walker


She awakes with the knowing that the brightest of light is accessible to her.

Her heart always burst wide open for anyone to see but weary in a world that does not easily receive this treasure.

Does she shut down that expansiveness because of the ever present hurt, pain, rage, sorrow and confusion of the world or does she soldier on? Is it even a choice?

 

A bright light in the darkest of circumstances holding onto the slightest seed of hope that someone may be reached, may be healed, may be released by the power of love, pure intention and a listening heart.

An ultra sensitive and also a fierce warrior.  

Her walk is a solo journey but she is unwavering in the knowing that she is divinely guided.

 

The suffering is constant and unrelenting but the beauty of knowing her soul, heart and its capacity makes every moment worthwhile.

Blessed and highly favored. In a world becoming ever more complicated and disconnected her hope that love conquers all pushes her forward with every step and every breath.

Notebook Dried Plants

The Great Mirror 

Childlike yet wise beyond human years,
Feminine and masculine yin and yang
Introvert and extrovert expressed 
Shy yet bold 
Reserved yet outspoken 
Humble yet confident 
The dark and the light.
"Who are you they ask?!"
I am a shadow walker.

One cannot experience the fullest expression of love and joy without exploring the deepest and darkest shadow.

"Who are you?," they ask again and again!
The mirror responds,"Who am I?"
"I am you." All life ever connected. 
"Are you brave enough to look?"


 

When Fire meets Water

Lava meets the Hawaiian Pacific.
They say you cannot ask fire to be water or water to be fire.
But perhaps two opposites need each others strengths.

As the hot lava meets the ocean water, transmutation results. 
The fire heats the water allowing the water to release what has been held beneath the surface for far too long.
While the water cools the fire transforming the lava to solid earth where it can rest and be at peace yet again.

They say you cannot ask fire to be water or water to be fire.
However, in perfect divine creation alchemy allows each element to be itself; yet grow, expand, release and ascend its limitations.


Although differences can most certainly create discomfort, only through alternate perspectives can fire become water and water become fire.

They say you cannot ask fire to be water or water to be fire.
But perhaps two opposites need each others strengths.

The Footsteps before Me 

(Thank you Madre Ayahuasca for healing generational trauma).

Paths unknown,
Step by step; 
Faces unseen,
You forged the path ahead of me.

What did you see?
What was left unseen?
How did you feel about life?

I don’t know the colour of your eyes.
I don’t know the sound of your laugh or how many tears were left unexpressed or unseen.

I feel you great ancestor.
I feel the deep unexpressed pain,
As what is in you is in me.

The pain cuts deep like a knife some days.
How I wish I could have held you great ancestor to ease the string.
So, I hold myself.
And in doing so as I release our shared pain light enters the darkness.

I feel your vast strength!
As what is in you is in me.
I feel your bravery, your determination, your empathy and compassion.

Paths unknown,

Step by step;
Pain shared and passed down.
As with the dark and the light, pain reveals your immense strength.

Shared pain,
Shared strengths;
Step by step,
Paths unknown yet merging and healing in perfect synergy.

Thank you, great ancestor.

As within, so without,
As above, so below,
All my relations,
It is so.




Unfallen tears upon tears
Silent angry screams upon screams
Muted laughs upon laughs
Songs unsung 
Dances unfelt
Hugs not embraced
Dreams untold
Piling up lifetime after lifetime

I hear you great ancestor

I feel you
You are no longer silent

 

Pain into peace
Silence into expression
Suppression into connection
Stuck energy released, flowing as naturally as a gentle inhale and exhale

We are healing
We are healing 
We are healing ... across all planes, lifetimes and timelines

 

Take comfort in knowing your suffering no longer goes unnoticed, unheard and unfelt
Blame is no consideration
As the baby takes its first breath all is perfect until its not
Manifesting the unconscious patterns
Know that you belonged because you existed
You are safe, you are heard, you are valued
Gods perfect creation

Thank you great ancestor for all the lessons; the suffereing
The dark liberating the light 

 

We are healing
We are healing 
We are healing .. across all planes, lifetimes and timelines

Safe just to be

Whole
All my relations
Ahaya

To my Ancestors from my Ancestors

Oh Brother, Oh Father 

(Dedicated to my father. Channeled from my ancestors).

 

Oh brother, how I admired you;

You were stronger, faster and smarter.

 Forever dad's favorite!

 

How I loved to fish, bike and play with you,

Ever running to always catch up but seemly always two steps behind.

 

Oh brother," Why won’t you slow down to walk beside me; not infront of me?".

Oh father," When will you see that I am standing beside him?".

Oh father," When will you see I exist too? I matter, I'm worthy and I am fully capable."

 

Oh brother, how you influenced my every move.

Oh father, "Where were you to allow me to be me! Not him?".

Oh brother, "Who knew the paths we would take?".

 

Oh father, I know you see me now.

You see I exist,

You see I matter,

You see I am worthy,

You see I am capable of anything,

You see I am a great man, great friend, great brother, great husband and great father.

 

Oh brother, 

Oh father,

Here we stand divided but connected finally, standing beside each other hand in hand.

We are healing, 

We are healing, 

We are healing,

 

All my relations, 

And so it is.

 

They Call her Crazy

"They call her crazy!"

 

Too honest;

Too sensitive,

Too vocal,

Too strong;

Too innovative,

Too enthusiastic,

Too independent! 

Too fierce!

Too real,

Too controversial and different in the unique walk she chooses.

Too much!

 

They are right.

She was crazy.

She was crazy when she didn’t see her beauty in her uniqueness.

She was crazy when she tried to fit into a system that didn’t align with her soul.

She was crazy when she didn't see her light amongst the shadows. 

She was crazy when she ever thought she was not enough or too much. 

 

So let her be crazy to others if crazy means she lives in her divinely gifted authentic self.

 

So welcome the crazy!

She now wholeheartedly accepts her truth, beauty and guidance.

"They call her crazy!"

The Last Blue Chair 

Surrender the old,
Welcome the new.

Relationships not of the highest good cleared.
Home and worldly goods sold.
Old systems, programs and career cleared.
Where I'll land only spirit knows.

All that is left is one blue chair in my empty house.
Do I let you come along?
Or do I completely die to the old to rise anew? 

You feel familiar.
A remnant from an old timeline.
What is so risky about letting go of this last one percent when I have already surrendered ninety nine percent?!

The last blue chair.
Do you stay or do you go?
I know liberation and freedom awaits if I release you.

As fear presents itself in many shapes and colours.

The last blue chair.